Muumuu House + St. Mark's Bookshop

***Warning: Synecdoche, New York Spoilers***

                Butterflies flutter about in my stomach. They move far more quickly than me. I’m scared. I’m also frightened. What can I do? What should I do? 

                Today I am stepping out from the blog-o-sphere into the harsh, unforgiving world of IRL. IRL is a different experience from writing about people I’ve never met. Lately I appear to be changing my tactics. Before I never would have considered this approach of meeting authors in person but this is a new year. I have resolutions to keep. 

                I am going to head out on the highway, looking for adventure; you know whatever comes my way. Super-stoked for what shall transpire on this day. I have dreamt about such a reading with so many wonderful writers. Basically every writer here I’ve mentioned if not a lot then at least a little bit. I would like to introduce each one of them. 

                Megan ‘Ass’ Boyle is alt lit famous. Some of my friends began blogging again after reading her book ‘Selected Unpublished Blog Posts of a Mexican Panda Express Employee’. Once they finished reading Boyle’s book they regained faith in the blogging world. As someone who tries to improve the blogging world, I adored the book. My friends were right. She shows a new way of writing a blog, of showing how to express oneself. It is a gorgeous book. I tell my friends she lives in Baltimore, which is a lie. But I don’t want them to stalk her. You’re welcome Megan. Now Megan writes for Vice Magazine and is allegedly the ‘bees-knees’. Think I owe her a hug since I keep on seeing her read but lack the ‘guts’ to actually introduce myself. Also I think if I introduce myself I get a free beer. Since I just put that into writing with witnesses reading I think that means it is ‘legally binding’.  

                Brandon Scott Gorrell is an endangered hamster according to Tao Lin. He wears glasses. He heads up Thought Catalog, an elite online catalog of thoughts. It is a good site and required reading for those interested in the relevant alt-lit world. Besides his Thought Catalog fame, he wrote the reasonably titled ‘During my Nervous Breakdown I want to have a Biographer present’. It makes sense to have a biographer around during that pivotal moment in time. 

                Spencer Madsen: where to begin with this bro? I met him IRL before. That’s partly why I’m going. I rarely introduce myself in public. In case I’m too nervous to introduce myself hopefully Spencer can ‘nudge’ me in the right direction. By now his tweets are legendary. His writing is amazing and getting better all gosh darn time. I recommend his writing to viewers like you. Plus, thanks to his Tumblr, I am aware of his diet on a daily basis. 

                Giancarlo DiTrapano is a bit of a mystery. I’ve read his work. I follow him on twitter. His twitter handle is ‘NYTyrant’. Maybe he was the guy who instituted the police state in that movie ‘Synecdoche, New York’ about that bummed-out theater director who spent his entire life making a production about his life before society collapsed around him and he died. Guess I probably ruined the whole movie for you. Don’t worry though, that movie is ‘mad bleak’ anyway. 

                Marie Calloway is a cat existentialist. I have written about her before. I’m probably a select few of people who wrote about her story ‘Adrien Brody’ and simultaneously actually read it. Her presence on Facebook is really positive. As an additional bonus, she has great taste in music, which matters to someone who has written about 500 music reviews. I get a positive feeling interacting with her on Facebook and am looking forward to hearing her reading tonight. 

                Tao Lin is the MC. I like Tao Lin. He has been hustling. He got a book deal worth $50,000 or something like that. He writes for Vice Magazine. Tao Lin recently had a ‘viral’ Tumblr post involving a drug addled amorphous red blob. Tao Lin seems nice. Glad he runs the Muumuu House publishing house. People are pretty divided on Tao Lin and his writing. Most likely if you are reading this on my blog you’re probably on the ‘pro-Tao Lin’ side. 

                When will alt lit get its alt shit together? It may be tonight. Tonight is going to be a good night. Come one; come all to 31 Third Avenue New York, New York 10003 at 7 pm.